Tired of being tired?
I bet. Most people are these days, if the ubiquity of caffeinated and sweetened things is any indication.
Cool with me. I sell those things.
But what if, you know, you wanted to wake up every day, feeling energetic, perky, ready to tear apart the day like some sort of large predatory cat?
Well, get your claws out, tiger, because a customer shared the secret with me today.
Drink coffee right before bed.
That way, when you wake up, you're already wired. Fucking. Brilliant.
So brilliant that I decided to try it myself tonight. So brilliant that I'm already feeling great! And it's 1:30 AM! And I'm not even tired! Yeah! Fuck you, sleep!
Still, he kind of implied I should be, you know, asleep at some point. I mean, that seems reasonable.
Maybe I shouldn't have had 6 shots of espresso and two cups of iced tea before the bedtime coffee? Huh? Maybe. He didn't give me a rule book, just inspiration.
Whatever. Revolutionaries ain't got time for semantics.
I'll sleep when I'm dead.
Or be compost. You know, whatever.