August 2, 2012

Juggling, Best Left to Clowns

I was at the grocery store yesterday, holding two pears, looking at something called blk. It looked like a black bottle of water, but was, in fact, a clear bottle containing black water. (As an aside, I did in fact buy the water, because I'm prone to impulsive beverage purchases. It tasted like water, no better, no worse. Maybe the fulvic acid did something cool, but I don't feel superhuman yet.) I wondered if this was some sports supplement for paramilitary mercenary groups, and then if anyone would get that reference. I decided that a few people would, but maybe not, and ultimately, that it was getting written anyway.

Then I decided to attempt to juggle the pears. Yes, it was only two, and yes, I'm still calling it juggling. Or an attempt, at least. More accurately, I tossed them inches in the air, missed, and dropped both of them. I looked around, saw no one, grabbed the bottle, the pears, and sauntered off. I did not drop anything else that night.

But this morning? This morning, I managed to splash my crotch with espresso, soy milk, and chocolate syrup. And no, I didn't spill a soy mocha on myself, these were three separate incidents. I knocked over a cup that had only espresso on it, sloshed a newly open half gallon of soy milk (and very nearly dropping the whole thing), and somehow, missed the cup altogether while squirting chocolate syrup in that general direction.

All of this happened because, as demonstrated with the pears, I suck at juggling. Don't get my wrong, I trust myself on the machine during the busiest of rushes, and despite those mishaps, every drink got out on time, and on point. People complimented me, tipped me, and took pictures of the latte art with their smart phones. But I do make mistakes, and when I do, it's because I try and do too many things at once, rather than one at a time.

The lesson here is a simple one, but easily forgotten in the chaos of a morning rush: Do one thing. When that is done, do the next thing. Do this, and you make progress faster, and better. Your drink quality will improve, and you'll waste less product. Oh, and you'll save on laundry as well.

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